Lighting Menorah in remembrance of our dear Jewish friend









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We lost someone whom we loved dearly and we are also honoring the family's way of grieving. However, we'd like to light the Menorah we recently purchased in his memory this Dec 2nd. With much respect and reverence, I would simply like a yes or a no if doing so is dishonorable to your faith.










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    up vote
    8
    down vote

    favorite












    We lost someone whom we loved dearly and we are also honoring the family's way of grieving. However, we'd like to light the Menorah we recently purchased in his memory this Dec 2nd. With much respect and reverence, I would simply like a yes or a no if doing so is dishonorable to your faith.










    share|improve this question

























      up vote
      8
      down vote

      favorite









      up vote
      8
      down vote

      favorite











      We lost someone whom we loved dearly and we are also honoring the family's way of grieving. However, we'd like to light the Menorah we recently purchased in his memory this Dec 2nd. With much respect and reverence, I would simply like a yes or a no if doing so is dishonorable to your faith.










      share|improve this question















      We lost someone whom we loved dearly and we are also honoring the family's way of grieving. However, we'd like to light the Menorah we recently purchased in his memory this Dec 2nd. With much respect and reverence, I would simply like a yes or a no if doing so is dishonorable to your faith.







      menora-chanukia derech-eretz-manners memorials






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      edited Nov 12 at 8:45









      WAF

      16.9k43398




      16.9k43398










      asked Nov 11 at 22:50









      I I

      433




      433




















          4 Answers
          4






          active

          oldest

          votes

















          up vote
          9
          down vote



          accepted










          Thanks for your consideration in asking this ahead of time. It seems to me that, not only would it not be disrespectful to light a Chanukah menorah in memory of your friend, it would be fairly traditional. Although the idea behind a menorah is to remind people of, or advertise, the miracles that Chanukah celebrates, it is, after all, a burning lamp, which is used traditionally to memorialize the dead. Just make sure you light it in a safe place and manner.






          share|improve this answer





























            up vote
            5
            down vote













            Assuming you aren't Jewish, there would be no mitzvah (commandment) for you to light the menorah, but I don't see anything wrong with it. I will add that perhaps the best way to honor your deceased friend is doing good deeds in his name, like tzedakah (charity).



            Take a look at this webpage to learn how to light the menorah. Just one catch, though - since you aren't Jewish make to sure to not recite the blessings.






            share|improve this answer





























              up vote
              1
              down vote













              Its a good Idea to do so, In my humble opinion instead of you lighting it donate the menorah to a jew who would light it with all the Prayers in memory of your friend and that would to a very big soul elevation of your friend 😉






              share|improve this answer




















              • We'd rather participate in his honor, but thank you for your humble opinion. Truly.
                – I I
                Nov 15 at 14:24

















              up vote
              -5
              down vote













              The Short version:
              Lighting a 7-hand Menorah on Chanukkah at home IS dishonorable in the Jewish Faith and it contradicts the Jewish Law.



              THe Long version:



              1. We hold that the biggest remembrance and practical benefit for the soul of the diseased is TORAH and Mitzvot and good deeds.

                The best way to remember a person is by organizing TORAH learning in public in his/her name, do Mitzvot yourself or pay others to do Mitzvot, especially pay to learn Torah and say Kaddishim, promote positive activities like volunteering or helping the needy or Tzedaka etc.


              2. Lighting a 7-hand Menorah at home has no meaning and no tradition in Judaism since the destruction of the Temple and it is explicitly forbidden to light at home as it is תבנית כלי קודש. See Rambam הלכות בית הבחירה ז, י and Shu"A יו"ד קמ"א.


              3. Lighting a 8-hand menorah is dedicated to Chanukkah as a distinctive Jewish festival and can not be used for mourning. It is clearly forbidden for Jews to light a 7-hand Menorah for Chanukkah candles!


              4. If you don't care what Judaism says and want to do what you want, you're free to do it your way, but remember it would be a much more useful remembrance if you spend the money on Tzedakkah instead of the oil or candles.






              share|improve this answer


















              • 2




                This is not halachic truth for many reasons. (1) you're attaching too much significance to the menorah. Having one is a hiddur at best, all you need is candles (and maybe a kli to hold them but it doesn't need 8 branches). (2) "if you're Jewish you're doing that anyway, you need to add something for remembrance" Doing a mitzvah you were not otherwise going to do is most definitely a good way to remember someone, even if it's obligatory and you were supposed to do it anyway. (3) the menorah accomplishes pirsumei nisa, publicizing the miracle of Chanukah, which arguably fulfills your (1)
                – Heshy
                Nov 12 at 14:23










              • @Heshy "you were not otherwise going " - exactly what I said but every Jew is commanded anyway, so it only counts if you ADD something, not do what you're ought to do anyway. 2. As I said Menorah is כלי קודש and is forbidden from being used at home since the destruction.
                – Al Berko
                Nov 12 at 14:29






              • 3




                Are you saying people making an extra effort to daven with a minyan in memory of relatives are not doing anything, because they are supposed to daven with a minyan anyway??? And "menorah" just means a lamp. When people say menorah 99% of the time they mean an 8 branch one. I was taught in kindergarten that you're supposed to call the 8 branch one a "Chanukiyah" and "Menorah" only refers to the one in the Beis Hamikdash, but that's completely incorrect. sefaria.org/Mishnah_Sukkah.5.2 sefaria.org/Chayei_Adam%2C_Shabbat_and_Festivals.154.11
                – Heshy
                Nov 12 at 14:45






              • 7




                While the question says "menorah", it's almost certainly talking about a chanukiyah. People, especially non-Jews, often say the former when they mean the latter. More importantly, I don't see how you have addressed the question of whether it would be inappropriate for presumed non-Jews to light this kind of lamp in memory of someone. The OP isn't asking about fulfilling a mitzvah but about not giving offense. There are things we try to hold as our own and don't want gentiles doing (like fully observing Shabbat), so it's not a baseless question.
                – Monica Cellio
                Nov 12 at 20:03


















              4 Answers
              4






              active

              oldest

              votes








              4 Answers
              4






              active

              oldest

              votes









              active

              oldest

              votes






              active

              oldest

              votes








              up vote
              9
              down vote



              accepted










              Thanks for your consideration in asking this ahead of time. It seems to me that, not only would it not be disrespectful to light a Chanukah menorah in memory of your friend, it would be fairly traditional. Although the idea behind a menorah is to remind people of, or advertise, the miracles that Chanukah celebrates, it is, after all, a burning lamp, which is used traditionally to memorialize the dead. Just make sure you light it in a safe place and manner.






              share|improve this answer


























                up vote
                9
                down vote



                accepted










                Thanks for your consideration in asking this ahead of time. It seems to me that, not only would it not be disrespectful to light a Chanukah menorah in memory of your friend, it would be fairly traditional. Although the idea behind a menorah is to remind people of, or advertise, the miracles that Chanukah celebrates, it is, after all, a burning lamp, which is used traditionally to memorialize the dead. Just make sure you light it in a safe place and manner.






                share|improve this answer
























                  up vote
                  9
                  down vote



                  accepted







                  up vote
                  9
                  down vote



                  accepted






                  Thanks for your consideration in asking this ahead of time. It seems to me that, not only would it not be disrespectful to light a Chanukah menorah in memory of your friend, it would be fairly traditional. Although the idea behind a menorah is to remind people of, or advertise, the miracles that Chanukah celebrates, it is, after all, a burning lamp, which is used traditionally to memorialize the dead. Just make sure you light it in a safe place and manner.






                  share|improve this answer














                  Thanks for your consideration in asking this ahead of time. It seems to me that, not only would it not be disrespectful to light a Chanukah menorah in memory of your friend, it would be fairly traditional. Although the idea behind a menorah is to remind people of, or advertise, the miracles that Chanukah celebrates, it is, after all, a burning lamp, which is used traditionally to memorialize the dead. Just make sure you light it in a safe place and manner.







                  share|improve this answer














                  share|improve this answer



                  share|improve this answer








                  edited Nov 12 at 10:46









                  b a

                  16.1k23478




                  16.1k23478










                  answered Nov 11 at 23:13









                  msh210

                  47.3k1188275




                  47.3k1188275




















                      up vote
                      5
                      down vote













                      Assuming you aren't Jewish, there would be no mitzvah (commandment) for you to light the menorah, but I don't see anything wrong with it. I will add that perhaps the best way to honor your deceased friend is doing good deeds in his name, like tzedakah (charity).



                      Take a look at this webpage to learn how to light the menorah. Just one catch, though - since you aren't Jewish make to sure to not recite the blessings.






                      share|improve this answer


























                        up vote
                        5
                        down vote













                        Assuming you aren't Jewish, there would be no mitzvah (commandment) for you to light the menorah, but I don't see anything wrong with it. I will add that perhaps the best way to honor your deceased friend is doing good deeds in his name, like tzedakah (charity).



                        Take a look at this webpage to learn how to light the menorah. Just one catch, though - since you aren't Jewish make to sure to not recite the blessings.






                        share|improve this answer
























                          up vote
                          5
                          down vote










                          up vote
                          5
                          down vote









                          Assuming you aren't Jewish, there would be no mitzvah (commandment) for you to light the menorah, but I don't see anything wrong with it. I will add that perhaps the best way to honor your deceased friend is doing good deeds in his name, like tzedakah (charity).



                          Take a look at this webpage to learn how to light the menorah. Just one catch, though - since you aren't Jewish make to sure to not recite the blessings.






                          share|improve this answer














                          Assuming you aren't Jewish, there would be no mitzvah (commandment) for you to light the menorah, but I don't see anything wrong with it. I will add that perhaps the best way to honor your deceased friend is doing good deeds in his name, like tzedakah (charity).



                          Take a look at this webpage to learn how to light the menorah. Just one catch, though - since you aren't Jewish make to sure to not recite the blessings.







                          share|improve this answer














                          share|improve this answer



                          share|improve this answer








                          edited Nov 12 at 16:33









                          Alex

                          17.3k4289




                          17.3k4289










                          answered Nov 12 at 15:17









                          ezra

                          10.6k21352




                          10.6k21352




















                              up vote
                              1
                              down vote













                              Its a good Idea to do so, In my humble opinion instead of you lighting it donate the menorah to a jew who would light it with all the Prayers in memory of your friend and that would to a very big soul elevation of your friend 😉






                              share|improve this answer




















                              • We'd rather participate in his honor, but thank you for your humble opinion. Truly.
                                – I I
                                Nov 15 at 14:24














                              up vote
                              1
                              down vote













                              Its a good Idea to do so, In my humble opinion instead of you lighting it donate the menorah to a jew who would light it with all the Prayers in memory of your friend and that would to a very big soul elevation of your friend 😉






                              share|improve this answer




















                              • We'd rather participate in his honor, but thank you for your humble opinion. Truly.
                                – I I
                                Nov 15 at 14:24












                              up vote
                              1
                              down vote










                              up vote
                              1
                              down vote









                              Its a good Idea to do so, In my humble opinion instead of you lighting it donate the menorah to a jew who would light it with all the Prayers in memory of your friend and that would to a very big soul elevation of your friend 😉






                              share|improve this answer












                              Its a good Idea to do so, In my humble opinion instead of you lighting it donate the menorah to a jew who would light it with all the Prayers in memory of your friend and that would to a very big soul elevation of your friend 😉







                              share|improve this answer












                              share|improve this answer



                              share|improve this answer










                              answered Nov 14 at 2:48









                              Rh Haokip

                              1208




                              1208











                              • We'd rather participate in his honor, but thank you for your humble opinion. Truly.
                                – I I
                                Nov 15 at 14:24
















                              • We'd rather participate in his honor, but thank you for your humble opinion. Truly.
                                – I I
                                Nov 15 at 14:24















                              We'd rather participate in his honor, but thank you for your humble opinion. Truly.
                              – I I
                              Nov 15 at 14:24




                              We'd rather participate in his honor, but thank you for your humble opinion. Truly.
                              – I I
                              Nov 15 at 14:24










                              up vote
                              -5
                              down vote













                              The Short version:
                              Lighting a 7-hand Menorah on Chanukkah at home IS dishonorable in the Jewish Faith and it contradicts the Jewish Law.



                              THe Long version:



                              1. We hold that the biggest remembrance and practical benefit for the soul of the diseased is TORAH and Mitzvot and good deeds.

                                The best way to remember a person is by organizing TORAH learning in public in his/her name, do Mitzvot yourself or pay others to do Mitzvot, especially pay to learn Torah and say Kaddishim, promote positive activities like volunteering or helping the needy or Tzedaka etc.


                              2. Lighting a 7-hand Menorah at home has no meaning and no tradition in Judaism since the destruction of the Temple and it is explicitly forbidden to light at home as it is תבנית כלי קודש. See Rambam הלכות בית הבחירה ז, י and Shu"A יו"ד קמ"א.


                              3. Lighting a 8-hand menorah is dedicated to Chanukkah as a distinctive Jewish festival and can not be used for mourning. It is clearly forbidden for Jews to light a 7-hand Menorah for Chanukkah candles!


                              4. If you don't care what Judaism says and want to do what you want, you're free to do it your way, but remember it would be a much more useful remembrance if you spend the money on Tzedakkah instead of the oil or candles.






                              share|improve this answer


















                              • 2




                                This is not halachic truth for many reasons. (1) you're attaching too much significance to the menorah. Having one is a hiddur at best, all you need is candles (and maybe a kli to hold them but it doesn't need 8 branches). (2) "if you're Jewish you're doing that anyway, you need to add something for remembrance" Doing a mitzvah you were not otherwise going to do is most definitely a good way to remember someone, even if it's obligatory and you were supposed to do it anyway. (3) the menorah accomplishes pirsumei nisa, publicizing the miracle of Chanukah, which arguably fulfills your (1)
                                – Heshy
                                Nov 12 at 14:23










                              • @Heshy "you were not otherwise going " - exactly what I said but every Jew is commanded anyway, so it only counts if you ADD something, not do what you're ought to do anyway. 2. As I said Menorah is כלי קודש and is forbidden from being used at home since the destruction.
                                – Al Berko
                                Nov 12 at 14:29






                              • 3




                                Are you saying people making an extra effort to daven with a minyan in memory of relatives are not doing anything, because they are supposed to daven with a minyan anyway??? And "menorah" just means a lamp. When people say menorah 99% of the time they mean an 8 branch one. I was taught in kindergarten that you're supposed to call the 8 branch one a "Chanukiyah" and "Menorah" only refers to the one in the Beis Hamikdash, but that's completely incorrect. sefaria.org/Mishnah_Sukkah.5.2 sefaria.org/Chayei_Adam%2C_Shabbat_and_Festivals.154.11
                                – Heshy
                                Nov 12 at 14:45






                              • 7




                                While the question says "menorah", it's almost certainly talking about a chanukiyah. People, especially non-Jews, often say the former when they mean the latter. More importantly, I don't see how you have addressed the question of whether it would be inappropriate for presumed non-Jews to light this kind of lamp in memory of someone. The OP isn't asking about fulfilling a mitzvah but about not giving offense. There are things we try to hold as our own and don't want gentiles doing (like fully observing Shabbat), so it's not a baseless question.
                                – Monica Cellio
                                Nov 12 at 20:03














                              up vote
                              -5
                              down vote













                              The Short version:
                              Lighting a 7-hand Menorah on Chanukkah at home IS dishonorable in the Jewish Faith and it contradicts the Jewish Law.



                              THe Long version:



                              1. We hold that the biggest remembrance and practical benefit for the soul of the diseased is TORAH and Mitzvot and good deeds.

                                The best way to remember a person is by organizing TORAH learning in public in his/her name, do Mitzvot yourself or pay others to do Mitzvot, especially pay to learn Torah and say Kaddishim, promote positive activities like volunteering or helping the needy or Tzedaka etc.


                              2. Lighting a 7-hand Menorah at home has no meaning and no tradition in Judaism since the destruction of the Temple and it is explicitly forbidden to light at home as it is תבנית כלי קודש. See Rambam הלכות בית הבחירה ז, י and Shu"A יו"ד קמ"א.


                              3. Lighting a 8-hand menorah is dedicated to Chanukkah as a distinctive Jewish festival and can not be used for mourning. It is clearly forbidden for Jews to light a 7-hand Menorah for Chanukkah candles!


                              4. If you don't care what Judaism says and want to do what you want, you're free to do it your way, but remember it would be a much more useful remembrance if you spend the money on Tzedakkah instead of the oil or candles.






                              share|improve this answer


















                              • 2




                                This is not halachic truth for many reasons. (1) you're attaching too much significance to the menorah. Having one is a hiddur at best, all you need is candles (and maybe a kli to hold them but it doesn't need 8 branches). (2) "if you're Jewish you're doing that anyway, you need to add something for remembrance" Doing a mitzvah you were not otherwise going to do is most definitely a good way to remember someone, even if it's obligatory and you were supposed to do it anyway. (3) the menorah accomplishes pirsumei nisa, publicizing the miracle of Chanukah, which arguably fulfills your (1)
                                – Heshy
                                Nov 12 at 14:23










                              • @Heshy "you were not otherwise going " - exactly what I said but every Jew is commanded anyway, so it only counts if you ADD something, not do what you're ought to do anyway. 2. As I said Menorah is כלי קודש and is forbidden from being used at home since the destruction.
                                – Al Berko
                                Nov 12 at 14:29






                              • 3




                                Are you saying people making an extra effort to daven with a minyan in memory of relatives are not doing anything, because they are supposed to daven with a minyan anyway??? And "menorah" just means a lamp. When people say menorah 99% of the time they mean an 8 branch one. I was taught in kindergarten that you're supposed to call the 8 branch one a "Chanukiyah" and "Menorah" only refers to the one in the Beis Hamikdash, but that's completely incorrect. sefaria.org/Mishnah_Sukkah.5.2 sefaria.org/Chayei_Adam%2C_Shabbat_and_Festivals.154.11
                                – Heshy
                                Nov 12 at 14:45






                              • 7




                                While the question says "menorah", it's almost certainly talking about a chanukiyah. People, especially non-Jews, often say the former when they mean the latter. More importantly, I don't see how you have addressed the question of whether it would be inappropriate for presumed non-Jews to light this kind of lamp in memory of someone. The OP isn't asking about fulfilling a mitzvah but about not giving offense. There are things we try to hold as our own and don't want gentiles doing (like fully observing Shabbat), so it's not a baseless question.
                                – Monica Cellio
                                Nov 12 at 20:03












                              up vote
                              -5
                              down vote










                              up vote
                              -5
                              down vote









                              The Short version:
                              Lighting a 7-hand Menorah on Chanukkah at home IS dishonorable in the Jewish Faith and it contradicts the Jewish Law.



                              THe Long version:



                              1. We hold that the biggest remembrance and practical benefit for the soul of the diseased is TORAH and Mitzvot and good deeds.

                                The best way to remember a person is by organizing TORAH learning in public in his/her name, do Mitzvot yourself or pay others to do Mitzvot, especially pay to learn Torah and say Kaddishim, promote positive activities like volunteering or helping the needy or Tzedaka etc.


                              2. Lighting a 7-hand Menorah at home has no meaning and no tradition in Judaism since the destruction of the Temple and it is explicitly forbidden to light at home as it is תבנית כלי קודש. See Rambam הלכות בית הבחירה ז, י and Shu"A יו"ד קמ"א.


                              3. Lighting a 8-hand menorah is dedicated to Chanukkah as a distinctive Jewish festival and can not be used for mourning. It is clearly forbidden for Jews to light a 7-hand Menorah for Chanukkah candles!


                              4. If you don't care what Judaism says and want to do what you want, you're free to do it your way, but remember it would be a much more useful remembrance if you spend the money on Tzedakkah instead of the oil or candles.






                              share|improve this answer














                              The Short version:
                              Lighting a 7-hand Menorah on Chanukkah at home IS dishonorable in the Jewish Faith and it contradicts the Jewish Law.



                              THe Long version:



                              1. We hold that the biggest remembrance and practical benefit for the soul of the diseased is TORAH and Mitzvot and good deeds.

                                The best way to remember a person is by organizing TORAH learning in public in his/her name, do Mitzvot yourself or pay others to do Mitzvot, especially pay to learn Torah and say Kaddishim, promote positive activities like volunteering or helping the needy or Tzedaka etc.


                              2. Lighting a 7-hand Menorah at home has no meaning and no tradition in Judaism since the destruction of the Temple and it is explicitly forbidden to light at home as it is תבנית כלי קודש. See Rambam הלכות בית הבחירה ז, י and Shu"A יו"ד קמ"א.


                              3. Lighting a 8-hand menorah is dedicated to Chanukkah as a distinctive Jewish festival and can not be used for mourning. It is clearly forbidden for Jews to light a 7-hand Menorah for Chanukkah candles!


                              4. If you don't care what Judaism says and want to do what you want, you're free to do it your way, but remember it would be a much more useful remembrance if you spend the money on Tzedakkah instead of the oil or candles.







                              share|improve this answer














                              share|improve this answer



                              share|improve this answer








                              edited Nov 12 at 14:32

























                              answered Nov 12 at 6:57









                              Al Berko

                              4,168426




                              4,168426







                              • 2




                                This is not halachic truth for many reasons. (1) you're attaching too much significance to the menorah. Having one is a hiddur at best, all you need is candles (and maybe a kli to hold them but it doesn't need 8 branches). (2) "if you're Jewish you're doing that anyway, you need to add something for remembrance" Doing a mitzvah you were not otherwise going to do is most definitely a good way to remember someone, even if it's obligatory and you were supposed to do it anyway. (3) the menorah accomplishes pirsumei nisa, publicizing the miracle of Chanukah, which arguably fulfills your (1)
                                – Heshy
                                Nov 12 at 14:23










                              • @Heshy "you were not otherwise going " - exactly what I said but every Jew is commanded anyway, so it only counts if you ADD something, not do what you're ought to do anyway. 2. As I said Menorah is כלי קודש and is forbidden from being used at home since the destruction.
                                – Al Berko
                                Nov 12 at 14:29






                              • 3




                                Are you saying people making an extra effort to daven with a minyan in memory of relatives are not doing anything, because they are supposed to daven with a minyan anyway??? And "menorah" just means a lamp. When people say menorah 99% of the time they mean an 8 branch one. I was taught in kindergarten that you're supposed to call the 8 branch one a "Chanukiyah" and "Menorah" only refers to the one in the Beis Hamikdash, but that's completely incorrect. sefaria.org/Mishnah_Sukkah.5.2 sefaria.org/Chayei_Adam%2C_Shabbat_and_Festivals.154.11
                                – Heshy
                                Nov 12 at 14:45






                              • 7




                                While the question says "menorah", it's almost certainly talking about a chanukiyah. People, especially non-Jews, often say the former when they mean the latter. More importantly, I don't see how you have addressed the question of whether it would be inappropriate for presumed non-Jews to light this kind of lamp in memory of someone. The OP isn't asking about fulfilling a mitzvah but about not giving offense. There are things we try to hold as our own and don't want gentiles doing (like fully observing Shabbat), so it's not a baseless question.
                                – Monica Cellio
                                Nov 12 at 20:03












                              • 2




                                This is not halachic truth for many reasons. (1) you're attaching too much significance to the menorah. Having one is a hiddur at best, all you need is candles (and maybe a kli to hold them but it doesn't need 8 branches). (2) "if you're Jewish you're doing that anyway, you need to add something for remembrance" Doing a mitzvah you were not otherwise going to do is most definitely a good way to remember someone, even if it's obligatory and you were supposed to do it anyway. (3) the menorah accomplishes pirsumei nisa, publicizing the miracle of Chanukah, which arguably fulfills your (1)
                                – Heshy
                                Nov 12 at 14:23










                              • @Heshy "you were not otherwise going " - exactly what I said but every Jew is commanded anyway, so it only counts if you ADD something, not do what you're ought to do anyway. 2. As I said Menorah is כלי קודש and is forbidden from being used at home since the destruction.
                                – Al Berko
                                Nov 12 at 14:29






                              • 3




                                Are you saying people making an extra effort to daven with a minyan in memory of relatives are not doing anything, because they are supposed to daven with a minyan anyway??? And "menorah" just means a lamp. When people say menorah 99% of the time they mean an 8 branch one. I was taught in kindergarten that you're supposed to call the 8 branch one a "Chanukiyah" and "Menorah" only refers to the one in the Beis Hamikdash, but that's completely incorrect. sefaria.org/Mishnah_Sukkah.5.2 sefaria.org/Chayei_Adam%2C_Shabbat_and_Festivals.154.11
                                – Heshy
                                Nov 12 at 14:45






                              • 7




                                While the question says "menorah", it's almost certainly talking about a chanukiyah. People, especially non-Jews, often say the former when they mean the latter. More importantly, I don't see how you have addressed the question of whether it would be inappropriate for presumed non-Jews to light this kind of lamp in memory of someone. The OP isn't asking about fulfilling a mitzvah but about not giving offense. There are things we try to hold as our own and don't want gentiles doing (like fully observing Shabbat), so it's not a baseless question.
                                – Monica Cellio
                                Nov 12 at 20:03







                              2




                              2




                              This is not halachic truth for many reasons. (1) you're attaching too much significance to the menorah. Having one is a hiddur at best, all you need is candles (and maybe a kli to hold them but it doesn't need 8 branches). (2) "if you're Jewish you're doing that anyway, you need to add something for remembrance" Doing a mitzvah you were not otherwise going to do is most definitely a good way to remember someone, even if it's obligatory and you were supposed to do it anyway. (3) the menorah accomplishes pirsumei nisa, publicizing the miracle of Chanukah, which arguably fulfills your (1)
                              – Heshy
                              Nov 12 at 14:23




                              This is not halachic truth for many reasons. (1) you're attaching too much significance to the menorah. Having one is a hiddur at best, all you need is candles (and maybe a kli to hold them but it doesn't need 8 branches). (2) "if you're Jewish you're doing that anyway, you need to add something for remembrance" Doing a mitzvah you were not otherwise going to do is most definitely a good way to remember someone, even if it's obligatory and you were supposed to do it anyway. (3) the menorah accomplishes pirsumei nisa, publicizing the miracle of Chanukah, which arguably fulfills your (1)
                              – Heshy
                              Nov 12 at 14:23












                              @Heshy "you were not otherwise going " - exactly what I said but every Jew is commanded anyway, so it only counts if you ADD something, not do what you're ought to do anyway. 2. As I said Menorah is כלי קודש and is forbidden from being used at home since the destruction.
                              – Al Berko
                              Nov 12 at 14:29




                              @Heshy "you were not otherwise going " - exactly what I said but every Jew is commanded anyway, so it only counts if you ADD something, not do what you're ought to do anyway. 2. As I said Menorah is כלי קודש and is forbidden from being used at home since the destruction.
                              – Al Berko
                              Nov 12 at 14:29




                              3




                              3




                              Are you saying people making an extra effort to daven with a minyan in memory of relatives are not doing anything, because they are supposed to daven with a minyan anyway??? And "menorah" just means a lamp. When people say menorah 99% of the time they mean an 8 branch one. I was taught in kindergarten that you're supposed to call the 8 branch one a "Chanukiyah" and "Menorah" only refers to the one in the Beis Hamikdash, but that's completely incorrect. sefaria.org/Mishnah_Sukkah.5.2 sefaria.org/Chayei_Adam%2C_Shabbat_and_Festivals.154.11
                              – Heshy
                              Nov 12 at 14:45




                              Are you saying people making an extra effort to daven with a minyan in memory of relatives are not doing anything, because they are supposed to daven with a minyan anyway??? And "menorah" just means a lamp. When people say menorah 99% of the time they mean an 8 branch one. I was taught in kindergarten that you're supposed to call the 8 branch one a "Chanukiyah" and "Menorah" only refers to the one in the Beis Hamikdash, but that's completely incorrect. sefaria.org/Mishnah_Sukkah.5.2 sefaria.org/Chayei_Adam%2C_Shabbat_and_Festivals.154.11
                              – Heshy
                              Nov 12 at 14:45




                              7




                              7




                              While the question says "menorah", it's almost certainly talking about a chanukiyah. People, especially non-Jews, often say the former when they mean the latter. More importantly, I don't see how you have addressed the question of whether it would be inappropriate for presumed non-Jews to light this kind of lamp in memory of someone. The OP isn't asking about fulfilling a mitzvah but about not giving offense. There are things we try to hold as our own and don't want gentiles doing (like fully observing Shabbat), so it's not a baseless question.
                              – Monica Cellio
                              Nov 12 at 20:03




                              While the question says "menorah", it's almost certainly talking about a chanukiyah. People, especially non-Jews, often say the former when they mean the latter. More importantly, I don't see how you have addressed the question of whether it would be inappropriate for presumed non-Jews to light this kind of lamp in memory of someone. The OP isn't asking about fulfilling a mitzvah but about not giving offense. There are things we try to hold as our own and don't want gentiles doing (like fully observing Shabbat), so it's not a baseless question.
                              – Monica Cellio
                              Nov 12 at 20:03



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